


Victory from Defeat

by yuletide_archivist



Category: Shaun of the Dead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-12-22
Updated: 2006-12-22
Packaged: 2018-01-25 08:53:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1642622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yuletide_archivist/pseuds/yuletide_archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A victory snatched from what looked like defeat.  Liz, Shaun and Ed, post-movie.  Trisha Goddard makes a special appearance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Victory from Defeat

**Author's Note:**

> My first pinch hit!
> 
> Written for sheldrake

 

 

Victory in Defeat

Shaun dropped into the couch next to Liz, eyes on the telly. Trisha Goddard was already well into her annual parade of zombie rights activists. The bloke currently on the hotseat was from the national chapter of RAL (Reanimated Activists for the Living). He was munching on a raw chicken leg and blinking at the spitballs rebounding off his head. Trisha was looking bored.

"You nearly missed it," Liz said, focused on the show. She dipped into her bag of crisps and held out a handful to Shaun. He shoved the entire bunch into his mouth at once. "Don't get crumbs on the furniture."

He paused, then surreptitiously scraped at the sofa.

"I saw that."

Shaun's eye twitched, but he perked up as the camera switched to a full-face view of Trisha. Her curls waving faintly in a breeze, she smiled broadly.

"Thank you so much to Bruce of RAL, whose group is committed to moral flesh consumption by the reanimated." She rolled her eyes comically, to renewed applause and jeers.

Her perfect teeth shining brightly, she turned to another camera, the sounds of Bruce and his chair being dragged away fading. "And now, we'll talk to a man whose best friend is a zombie - "

Shaun jumped up, spilling more crisp crumbs to the floor. "I'm up! Liz, is the video recording?"

"Yes, you bleeding moron! Sit down!"

Shaun called out the back window toward the garden, keeping his eyes on the screen. "Ed, can you see?"

A clanking sounded outside. "Huuunnngh!"

"Good man."

Liz wrinkled her nose and pointedly turned on a fan. "Shaun, he'd better not be trampling my roses. You know how hard I work on the garden."

Ignoring that issue as something that would likely cause a row, Shaun settled back down on the sofa.

Trisha had by this point turned to her next guest. Shaun examined himself on the telly, and preened a bit. He might be looking slightly more, well, prosperous around the tum these days, but he thought he still cleaned up pretty well. Liz glanced and him and snorted.

"Righto, Prince William." Shaun ignored her and turned up the volume.

"Now Shaun," began Trisha with exagerated care, "You say your best friend is a zombie?" Her exquisitely made-up face arranged itself into Polite Disapproval. "That's rather unusual of you."

Shaun-on-telly shuffled uncomfortably. "Well, yes Trisha, he is, but then, he wasn't always a zombie, was he?"

"No, of course not," smiled Trisha, "But he certainly is now." The audience let out a whoop.

"Huuunnnghhh!!"

"You tell her, Ed."

When the audience settled down, Shaun piped up again. "Well. I couldn't abandon me best friend, even if he did lose a few IQ points en route, so to speak." He cleared his throat. "And gain a fondness for rare steak."

A few chuckles trickled out of the audience.

Trisha cleared her own throat. "So. What do you do with your best friend these days? I imagine cooking and camping trips are right out."

Shaun leaned forward on the couch, eyes bright. Liz shook her head, but kept her focus on the screen.

Back on the telly, Shaun smiled. "Basically, we do what we always did."

Trisha arched a perfectly plucked brow. "Really. I'd like to see that." The audience erupted in cheers, and Shaun-on-telly reached down under his seat and brought out a video game controller.

The camera zoomed out to show Shaun and Ed (firmly chained, just like the rest of the undead in studio) sitting in front of a small set. The large screen at the back of Trisha's studio lit up with a game of Undead Invasion already in progress. A voice boomed out over the audience.

"Player Two has joined the game."

Over the laughter from the telly, Shaun turned to Liz and grinned maniacally. "This is the best day of my life."

Liz looked at him calmly. "I thought you said our wedding was the best day of your life."

Shaun cringed a little. "But love, you know what I mean. I've wanted to be on this show for years!"

"Yeah," Liz conceded, "But she made a bloody fool of you! The whole audience was laughing at you and Ed."

Shaun relaxed, sure of his response this time. "You haven't seen the end yet."

"Huuuunnnnngggh!!!"

"Good man."

Liz gazed at Shaun expressionlessly for a moment, then turned back to the telly. The show now looked like the floor of a nightclub, lights flashing and rotating, cameras zooming in and out. Shaun and Ed were oblivious to the distractions, focused on the game in front of them. The game bleeped and blooped as the audience roared. Trisha stood up.

"See Liz, here it comes!"

Walking carefully over to the space between Shaun and Ed, Trisha leaned down for a closer look at the screen, her cleavage a magnet for most eyes in the room.

Including Ed's.

Ed dropped his controller and reached back to Trisha's skirt. With one hard yank, he ripped it down to her ankles. A loud gasp erupted from the audience. Ed reached up again and grabbed the flimsy blouse, tearing it off and exposing Trisha's tits to the world. A shriek rose up, the lights stopped flashing, and general mayhem erupted.

"Wait for it!" Shaun was fairly jumping on the sofa.

Over the hubbub on the studio floor, the video game voice boomed out again.

"Victory. Player Two wins."

"Yes!" Shaun pumped his fist in the air. "I beat you, you smelly bugger! Betrayed by Trisha Goddard's arse, no less!"

"Hunnngh. Huuuuhnnnhhhggnn!!!" The chain rattled outside again. Branches crunched outside the window.

Liz dropped her face in her hands and began to laugh helplessly.

"What's that? You want a rematch?" Shaun leapt to the window.

"Huunghhhg!"

"Double or nothing, then. It's on!" Shaun took off for the door.

Liz, still giggling, picked up the empty crisp packet and went to the kitchen for a broom and a good stiff drink.

 


End file.
